Interviewing Mr. V… With Spaghetti

Mr. V is eating spaghetti

S: Hello, how are you?

V: I'm pretty good, thanks how are you?

S: Good. So I'm just gonna ask you a couple of questions and then record the answers. Is that ok?

V: Ok, shoot. He looks quite frightened

S: Just letting you know they get progressively worse…

V: silence

S: Ok first question… What is your full name and where were you born?

V: Thomas John Vitovec, I'm from Abbotsford.

S: Interesting. How long have you been a teacher?

V: 5 years.

S: Wow, and what sports were your favourite?

V: Basketball, Volleyball, Hockey, and uhhh Soccer.

S: Ok, and what type of teacher do you want to be?

V: Great question. Relaxed and fun but also, like, respected.

S: That makes sense. Good answer.

S: And what are you hoping to accomplish as a gym teacher?

V: Build the school's athletic program to be one of the top programs in the province.

S: Interesting, and… weird question but…

V: Oh no..

S: What is your height and do you wish you were taller?

V: Intense side eye. I'm 5'7 and yes, I do wish I were taller… you suck.

S: I’m sorry and who's your favourite student?

V: No comment..

S: What grade are they in?

V: No comment..

S: Ok… If you could use one emoji to describe yourself what would it be?

V: I have to look.. Scrolls through phone. This one! Shows upside down happy face emoji.

S: Interesting choice, and oh this is an interesting question.

V: Go ahead!

S: If you had to survive a zombie apocalypse with your students, what would be your strategy?

V: No hesitation Sacrifice my students and go hide.

S: That's hilarious!

V: I'd go hide in Lynn Canyon and build a hut. I would then become friends with the animals and they would protect me.

S: Ok fun! What is your best dad joke?

V: I don't have any yet I’m not a dad

S: But if you had to pick one..

V: I don't know, maybe when I'm like 30 I'll have reached dad level.

S: Ok well I’ll give you an example: one time, like, last year I went up to my dad and said, ‘Hi dad, I’m hungry’ and then my dad said, ‘Hi hungry, I’m dad’..

V: Oh that's so bad. I'll pick that one.

S: Ok this next question is interesting. What is your greatest weakness?

V: Beige shorts cause I’m short. Intense look of acceptance for lack of tallness.

S: laughing Me too, don't worry! Ok if you were a sports ball which one would you be?

V: Basketball. Takes a huge bite of spaghetti.

S: What is your secret talent that no one knows about?

V: Ok so I always tell people that I'm not artistically or musically inclined but I can actually play 6 instruments.

S: What!? Which ones?

V: Guitar, piano, trumpet, harmonica, recorder, and the drums.

S: And do you still play any of these?

V: Just guitar.

S: And were you ever part of a choir?

V: Yeah but I hated it and it was in, like, elementary school.

S: If you had a theme song what would it be?

V: sighs That's so tuff (Yes she did ask him if it was tuff or tough) I don't know if its like a song song, but this song shows the Chicago Bulls intro theme song (Sirius).

S: Ok this is a good one: what is your most creative excuse for being late to class?

V: Ok, so walking to school I got chased by a bear then beat up the bear, then I got picked up by an eagle and it dropped me in the ocean so as I was swimming back to shore I got bit by a shark fought the shark, and then saw a dolphin and it swam me back to shore.

S: Ok? Moving on, what is the funniest thing a student has ever said to you?

V: Ok well I have to think of something that is like PG.

S: I'm sorry what? What do people say to you??

V: I've heard everything…

S: Like what?

V: You don't wanna know. I came from a public school.

S: silence

V: Well when I told the students at my old school that I was leaving they told me that they'll kidnap me and leave me in a classroom and lock the door.*Awkward silence* Yeah.. laughs.

S: Ok well if you were a color what color would you be?

V: Blue, definitely blue.

S: Why?

V: I don't know why. I just feel like I’d be a darker color

S: Ok last question if you could describe yourself with only one word what would it be? Only one word answers and then no explanation.

V: Chill

S: Ok, perfect thank you so much for the interview!

V: You’re  welcome. Bye!